Keep Fighting

I haven’t done this writing lark for a while now so I might be a bit rusty, so please bear with me...

It’s been a topsy-turvy year with plenty of ups and downs. As a family we started this year with our house on the market; it simply wasn’t fit for purpose anymore. This is the first time I’ve really told anyone this but I’ve spent most of 2018 living out of my front room; sleeping on the couch because I cannot climb my own stairs anymore. The effects of my condition are creeping up on me at an alarming rate, so much so that it’s even surprised me.

I’ve felt like half the man I am. So when the sale of our house fell through for the second time, it very nearly broke me. We had an expectation that we would move into a house that was fit for us, with downstairs living and a wet room etc for me, but we lost this due to our buyer pulling out on the day of exchange. So here I am, still living on the sofa and it’s bloody painful!

The weekend that the sale fell through I started to feel different in my head, the colour was fading to black and white and the joy was leaving me. My wife kept asking me if I was okay and I just said ‘yes’, when I knew full well that I wasn’t. It got to the Tuesday morning, I was supposed to be at work and I found myself just driving around in my car, so very sad inside myself and I never thought I would ever be happy again.

Luckily I took some advice from my HR department to speak to my GP, and that’s what I did, through so many tears. She told me that she didn’t think I was depressed but that I was putting myself under a lot of pressure, and that I needed to step back from certain things. So that’s what I did and I also had a conversation with my wife about everything. I always thought it would have been daft to say certain things, but it really wasn’t. If you’re struggling then the best thing you can do is talk.

I decided not to worry too much about the house and things I cannot do anything about; what will be will be. We have tried to make things more comfortable for myself and hope that we can move house shortly.

I’ve been so lucky with help from family and friends this year. We had a group of friends come round and they did a mini DIY SOS on our house to help, and it really has. It’s also some of the same friends that have been fundraising this year and we have raised the most amount that we have ever raised so far!

Now here’s a thing about life; when you’re in your hour of need you will notice those that come running to help, and it’s those people that you should never forget. Also, you should
always remember there may come a time when they need your help too, so be prepared to get stuck in.

So we got ourselves back on our feet a little despite this also being a year for progression with my condition. I have noticed that steps are far more painful and the energy is fading more and more, and my anxiety in public places is getting more erratic. But all of my team were pushing themselves; round the London Marathon, out of planes, cycling 100 miles and so much more!

It might sound silly, but if I keep moving then, well, I keep moving! I haven’t been fundraising like I usually do, but we have started to pick that up a bit more lately and I’m starting to feel myself again; physically and psychologically, which is great for everyone.

A couple of weeks ago I got a surprise email from Muscular Dystrophy UK telling me that I had been nominated for a national award as ‘Volunteer of the Year’. This news swept me off my feet. This was recognition for everyone that has ever helped me to help others. I did not see this as a personal achievement or a badge for me to wear, this was for everyone; the family, the friends, the fundraisers, the supporters, those that sponsored and those people that have read my previous blogs and may well be reading this right now. This is all on you and I cannot thank you all enough!

It just doesn’t stop either. I am surrounded by people with the same thoughts as me and that’s to be selfless and human and try to think of others, those that are grateful for all they have and decide to share a little.

In September there is a 35 mile charity walk in Yorkshire hosted by TheSquare Ball, the award ceremony for Volunteer of the Year is in London on September 20th and I’m also on my very own fundraising adventure which I can tell you more about later.
 
So, as always I’ll finish this in a positive manner...

If you ever need help then ask for it, if you ever feel that you won’t be happy then talk to someone, quickly. Lastly, as my Dad once said; if you have a roof over your head and you know where your next meal is coming from then go and look for someone who doesn’t have those things and help them. You can take that as a metaphor and use it in any way you wish, just do your best to be nice.

Most importantly, for myself and others, keep fighting!


 #MusclesMatter

Here is my film that we made to promote Muscular Dystrophy UK

Half-time

At the start of this year I said that I would write a blog once a month, to explain the reasoning behind moving a mile at each of my chosen locations. I shouldn’t really need to explain why I’m walking to our national stadium; it is what it is. I really didn’t know where to start with writing this, but luckily I have been speaking to my pal, Jon Howe. Jon is an author (‘The Only Place For Us’), Leeds United writer and friend, and it was easy to break the ice talking about Wembley, which then made it slightly easier to start writing this.

On July 30th, fifty years ago, England won the World Cup at Wembley, which is reason enough for me to include it among the places I wanted to walk to, but in the team that day was one of the most famous Leeds United players; Jack Charlton. Jack was a one-club player, which is a very rare thing nowadays, with 773 appearances for Leeds. He was a champion at club and international level and his solidarity and dedication to my beloved Leeds United is something that impresses and inspires me, and makes me proud to talk about him. 

So what about Leeds United as a club and its relationship with Wembley? Jon and I spoke about it and he summarised that “it’s been a largely fractious relationship” with the sort of playful glint in his eye and the hint of resignation that is a staple characteristic of all Leeds fans. 

Jon supplied me with a list of Leeds’s ten Wembley appearances: 

1965 - FA Cup Final v Liverpool, lost 2-1 after extra time 

1968 - League Cup Final v Arsenal, won 1-0

1970 - FA Cup Final v Chelsea, drew 2-2 after extra time, lost replay at Old Trafford

1972 - FA Cup Final v Arsenal, won 1-0 

1973 - FA Cup Final v Sunderland, lost 1-0 

1974 - Charity Shield v Liverpool, 1-1, lost on penalties 

1988 - Mercantile Credit Football Festival v Nottingham Forest, lost 3-0

1992 - Charity Shield v Liverpool, won 4-3 

1996 - League Cup Final v Aston Villa, lost 3-0 

2008 - League One Play-Off Final v Doncaster Rovers, lost 1-0 

So a record of played 10, won three, drawn one and ultimately lost six (i.e. one on pens) 

“Obviously, only the last one (2008) was at the re-built Wembley,” Jon adds “but there are some notable points which make some of Leeds’s Wembley appearances quite significant.” 

Jon then reels them off: 

- the 1970 draw was the first FA Cup Final to ever go to a replay 

- the 1972 Final was the 'Centenary Cup Final' ie. 100 years since the first one in 1872, it wasn't the 100th actual final because there weren't any during the two world wars.

- the 1974 Charity Shield game was the first held at Wembley (all previous were held at the ground of one of the competing clubs) 

- also in 1974, Leeds's Billy Bremner and Liverpool's Kevin Keegan were both sent off, the first British players to ever be sent off at Wembley. 

- the 1988 Mercantile Credit game was an invitation tournament to celebrate 100 years of the Football League. Jon adds: “The Football League invited loads of teams to play over a weekend, and because of this each game lasted only 40 minutes, which makes Leeds’s achievement of still managing to lose 3-0 particularly impressive……” 

With the facts laid out above I must say the stand out memory for me was losing to Doncaster Rovers in 2008; similar to the Play-Off final we played against Watford in Cardiff in 2006. I was absolutely heart broken, Leeds simply didn’t turn up and I don’t think I spoke to anyone about football for about a month; I really was stunned and hurt by it. 

Jon also recalls some other Wembley memories: “I only went to the old Wembley twice, and both within a few months of each other in 1996. I went to the League Cup Final that we lost 3-0 to Villa and then in June I went to England’s 4-1 win over Holland in Euro 96. You couldn’t possibly dream up two more contrasting experiences.” 

This Euro 96 memory brings to mind one of my favourite ever Wembley goals; Gazza’s turn and volley against Scotland and the famous ‘Dentist Chair’ celebration during that famous summer that seemed to go on forever. 

Luckily Wembley stadium has given me more memories than just football. I have been more times than I can remember to see bands play gigs there. I once got back stage passes to see The Doves, Happy Mondays and Oasis play there and it was all because of a total blag. It’s a long story but a florist I used to do a lot of business with said to me “Go to a caravan in the car park at Wembley, take ID, and say your name and they will give you tickets”. Yeah, alright mate, I thought. Turns out he was right; myself and my wife got given a very big envelope full of “access all areas” passes. This led to a very far out conversation with Bez from the Happy Mondays, an eye witness account of a Gallagher brothers fall out and lots and lots of free alcohol; all in all, a very good day! 

Wembley also hosted Live Aid in 1985 and it is only since researching Wembley and contemplating writing this that I realise I should be grateful for that. It wasn’t until now that I realised how much this has inspired me, especially as I go through this year asking people and venues for help in trying to achieve what I want for the greater good. 

In the autumn of last year I had this idea to walk to iconic arenas and sporting events in England due to it being an Olympic year and also 50 years since England won the World Cup, and some people said I wouldn’t be able to do it and I wouldn’t get the co-operation that I needed. I have, I did and I still am doing all that I set out to do and more, because people before me made a stand for something that was important to them and I have learnt from that. 

On Sunday I’ll walk up Wembley Way with friends, thinking about Jack, Norman Hunter and the rest of the boys that made history for us to enjoy and indulge in. Like football and Leeds United I will not take myself for granted. I’ll enjoy thinking about the potted history lesson that myself and Jon spoke about earlier this week, and just the fact that I do still have the ability to make that walk up to our national stadium. 

Myself, Jon and friends, victorious in Leeds!

This is now over the half way point of my challenge, and time for a much-needed, but brief, rest. And I just wanted to say a sincere thank you to everyone that has helped me so far this year; the sponsorship, the social media activity, physically holding me up and the genuine friendship that has shone through. I could carry on and mention so many names but too many people have been too nice. Last time I checked there was still no cure for Muscular Dystrophy, but I do believe that the 219 hours of research we have funded so far will one day help to change that, and that would not be possible without the people that have helped me. 


From the bottom of my heart, thank you! X 




You can follow me on twitter here https://twitter.com/HywoodMartin
You can follow Jon on twitter here https://twitter.com/jonhowe1971
 
#MoveAMileForMuscles

#IfICanYouCanToo 

All donations really are appreciated https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/Martin-Hywood3

You Tube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j__H3GJm_1Q
 

Influence & Inspiration

To make my world bigger is something I’ve been working on for a few years now, as things have got harder for me physically I seemed to have opened up more doors and gone further than I ever thought possible. This month we won a competition with the Discovery Channel just by telling people my plans for 2016 (and a lot of asking for votes!).

You may ask where I get my sense of adventure from, my direction, and the desire to push myself and learn along the way. I’d said it was definitely from my dad, a man influenced by The Goons and Monty Python. Add in a passion for travel and educating and in some distorted way that moulded me. The comedy element is an important factor because as children that’s how I, my brothers and sister learnt, obviously not orthodox but fantastic nonetheless, I’ll explain…

Our mum used to work as a waitress at the local Berni Inn and our dad used to drop Mum at work for her night shift, drive round the corner and then ask “Who wants to play the ‘Where are we’ game?” We would all shout back “YES!” and then we would either jump in the boot of our car or the back of Dad’s work van. Eyes closed, we would either be driven a few streets or perhaps miles and we would take turns at guessing where the vehicle had stopped, mostly in high-pitched voices à la Harry Secombe or Peter Sellers. Our parents also took advantage of sunny Sundays, and the ‘spare’ fiver or tenner for fuel would take us miles. Dad’s excursions, inclusive of a history lesson, were like his comedy influences, you never knew where you would be taken and the facts would be a bit leftfield.

An example would be a visit to Warwick Castle, we couldn’t afford admission so we’d go as far as the portcullis, and we wouldn’t be told that what we saw before us was built by William the Conqueror in 1068, no, it would be a petrifying story about the holes in the roof above and that hot oil and wax was poured on potential intruders. Sometimes we’d go to the coast on that thin fuel allowance, stop at Lulworth Cove and Dad would say “If you ever need to know about coastal erosion then look up this place; read a book”. Then, we’d get in the car and drive home again. The seed of curiosity was planted and I went on to get an ‘A’ in GCSE Geography, using Lulworth and coastal erosion as my subject matter.

So this then leads me on to talk about my most recent mile, and my next. I wrote about the facts of Iffley Road in my last blog, yet I had no idea how much of a challenge it was going to be. As soon as I stepped out onto the track I had a huge psychological battle which I managed to overcome and win, I couldn’t believe I did it.

What of the Oval then? I can tell you this; it hosted the very first FA Cup Final between the Wanderers and the Royal Engineers in 1872. Morton Betts scored the only goal of the game on 15 minutes and the Wanderers won! A distinctive feature of this ground is its neighbouring Victorian gasometer; built in the 1800s it now has a listed status. Just like my father, I do not feel it necessary to state the obvious, that it is most definitely one of the most famous cricket grounds in the world; read a book.

Saturday is my third mile of the year and like last month’s mile, when I was joined by the fantastic Tommy Lloyd, I will be once again joined by a young man who has also been pushing himself for others.

Archie Hill was diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy in 2008 at just 3 years old. Duchenne is a severe degenerative muscle-wasting disease, which will unfortunately lead to paralysis and will significantly shorten his life. Selflessly, Archie and his family have asked to ‘Move a Mile For Muscles’ with me to raise much-needed awareness and funds. Archie has put himself up to help others more than once. Alongside other boys with Duchenne, Archie and the group took their fight for Translarna (the first treatment approved for the underlying cause of DMD,) to the very top and knocked on 10 Downing Street asking for answers on access to rare disease drugs.

Archie at No 10

 

Just like Tommy, I consider Archie to be courageous and he should be an inspiration to many at such a young age. So I can most certainly say that I will complete Saturday’s mile whatever it takes, and hopefully won’t get beat up by myself like I did at Iffley Road.

Archie is moving a mile for muscles and if he can, WE can too!


Thanks for the sense of adventure Dad and for making my world bigger.


“Always look on the bright side of life” x

You can sponsor OUR miles here ... https://www.justgiving.com/Martin-Hywood3

You can watch my short film here... 

Follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/HywoodMartin

#MoveAMileForMuscles

#IfICanYouCanToo

 

Strength In Numbers

At the start of this year I had plans to raise awareness and funds for the Muscular Dystrophy Campaign. It’s what I do because I suffer from the condition and I have become extremely passionate about wanting to help. This is how our story unfolded and what we did…

Walking Football.

For quite a while now I’ve been hearing about walking football, the concept seems to have gained a lot of momentum too recently with the help of a television commercial encouraging a group to use social media to get others involved and that’s what seems to have happened.

After about the 50^th viewing, I had become intrigued to the point of wanting to see if I could give it a go myself. First step was to find out what walking football was, who was eligible and on the back of the advice of the advert I took to social media to see if there was a group or team of walking footballers near me… and there was.

I first got in touch with Aylesbury United’s walking football club on Facebook, I asked when, where and who could play? “In two night’s time, locally and anyone” were the answers. That also applied to me, an ambulant disabled man, who could hardly walk at all. 

Over the next 48 hours this was something that I thought long and hard about. I’m always pushing myself physically but I’m getting more apprehensive about being alone or without any assistance when walking or just being out and about. My balance is terrible and my legs constantly burn and feel shaky to the point of always wanting to take the weight off, even after just a few steps. Luckily some advice from my wife got rid of those anxieties in just a couple of sentences. Like every idea I have or challenge that I’m thinking about I always run it passed Michelle first and she will always comes back with a very honest opinion and in the case of walking football and my apprehension Michelle simply said “You need to concentrate on what you can do and not what you can’t, at this moment you can walk so you need to do this.” Well that was me told, wasn’t it?

18:55, a bitterly cold Monday night, in a car park next to an artificially turfed pitch.

I left the blistering warm, comfort of my car and made my way under the floodlights to meet Matt Doherty, the man I’d been talking to on social media about walking football and the manager of my local team. Matt briefly explained the rules and the fact that there was no discrimination here, it’s open to everyone but predominately over 50’s, throw in’s are roll in’s, no running, and that’s it. I initially told Matt that I would just be here to spectate as my legs were very weak and it had been a long day.

These were football supporters playing of many different clubs from Barcelona, both sides of Manchester, lots of London clubs, myself in my Leeds top and Matts very own Aylesbury United of the Evo-stik southern league. There was also a big variation in age with the players, youngest being late teens to the oldest being 79 years old.

I spent most of the game walking up and down the line and listening to all well mannered teasing, mockery in an air of persiflage. Running was definitely not allowed and it was made obvious that it would result in a free kick. I must admit it was funny seeing people trying their best not to run. One thing I must say though is that when there was a fall or a player went down to the ground then play was stopped and the players welfare was the biggest concern and taken care of by everyone, brilliant.

It was near the end, with 15 minutes to go that I felt itchy feet and an urge to get on the pitch. I couldn’t possibly call it a night without getting involved and giving it a go so I gestured to Matt that I wanted to give it a go and I was on. Left wing with absolutely no chance whatsoever for the first 5 minutes, sheer frustration. My head knew what I needed to do but my legs weren’t interested. Walking too slow and the ball went out, late kick and miss, ball went out. I just wasn’t quick enough. Eventually I got the ball a couple of times and got rid of it as quick. I felt like a funambulist with no balance bar at all, completely alone and vulnerable.

It was the eleventh hour when “Geordie” got the ball in the area, he had no room so passed it out to me, I trapped it, he moved to the room he needed, I passed it back, he put it across the penalty area and another player put it away! That… that’s what had made it all worth it and like all the others that I’d seen smiling all evening, I was now grinning from ear to ear. This may sound extremely insignificant to someone who is able bodied and plays football often but it meant the world to me.

“Same time next week?” Matt called and after that I got a picture of the teams and everyone was off. I was shattered then and I’m shattered now, still, three days later but that’s the price I pay I guess for pushing myself. It was worth it though and will now always be that way because I’m concentrating on what I can do and not on what I can’t.

You can join Matt and the team on Quarrendon astro turf, Aylesbury, every Monday at 19:00. Subs £3 and also the team face book page is here>> https://www.facebook.com/WalkingFootballAylesbury

 Alternatively just google ‘Walking football’ and your local area, I’m sure you’ll find a club.

Follow me on twitter @HywoodMartin